Today was one of those days.
I’ve been struggling with depression this entire week and today I kicked its butt! But not without the help of my heavenly Father and my earthly Dad.
You see I have a 21 yr. old son that I only hear from when he needs something and though I Praise God that he is still alive and well to be able to call me and ask me for things, it sometimes gets to me. We use to be so close, he’s a Momma boy, still is to this day but he’s been hurt over the years and has this wall up so he won’t get hurt again and shuts everyone out that loves him.
I know that one day God will tear down that wall and raise him up to be the man of God he was created to be, but until then I pray, intercede and just love him where he is at.
This same son has a 2 yr. old daughter, my precious Granddaughter Orion, whom I get to watch this weekend while her Momma goes to a wedding. Being able to see my granddaughter is an answer to prayer and something I don’t take lightly but I’ll be honest, I was allowing the world to creep in and try to steal my joy.
I’ve been working on this website along with my Livinlyfe Marketing website and feel like I’m not moving forward. Working from home you face challenges that many don’t realize you face. Even though I work for myself I have goals that I need to meet, the focus is everything because there are so many things that try to distract you and when the day is over and you haven’t met your goals or accomplished anything you wanted to, it can be disheartening. Then have days like that, that turn into weeks and you’re battling depression and oppression.
That’s where I was this week. I hadn’t accomplished everything I set out to do and having my granddaughter for 4 days was going to set me back even more.
How absolutely sad when the very thing you prayed years for is answered and you can’t enjoy it because you’re so worried about earthly things, like your own business, money and time. Let’s just say that it was a harsh slap in the face and something I knew I needed God to help me through.
So I went straight to the Bible, the living word of God that is more powerful and “sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. “ Hebrews 4:12
I started to meditate on the scriptures when my Dad calls me and he knows right away that something is wrong.
I explain to him everything I’m feeling and the thoughts I’m experiencing and he asks me 3 simple questions.
Question # 1: Is your boss General Custer? (I thought he said, Colonial Mustard, hee hee)
To which I respond, “I don’t even know who Colonial Mustard is other than a suspect in the game of Clue.” (One of my many blonde, Polack moments lol) He proceeds to tell me it’s the guy who led his troops against the Indians and they all died. So my answer to that question was definitely No!
Question # 2: The work you would be doing in the next 4 days that you have your granddaughter Orion, will your name be in the History books 200 yrs. from now?
Well…no it wouldn’t be and frankly, none of the work I’ve ever done up to this point would get my name in the History books.
Question # 3: If you don’t do anything on your websites for the next 4 days will you still get into heaven?
Well since we don’t get into heaven by works but through the belief in Jesus Christ that he was the son of God and went to the cross for our sins and rose again then Yes, I’ll still make it into heaven.
So then, if your boss isn’t General Custer and you’re not being led to die today and the work you would have done won’t get your name in the History books nor will it get you into heaven then LET IT ALL GO and enjoy every single moment you have with your granddaughter this weekend.
That was all I needed to hear. Coupled in with the scriptures that I meditated on like:
“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” Matthew 6:34
“Cast your cares on the LORD and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken.” Psalm 55:22
“Can anyone of you by worrying add a single hour to your life? “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you-you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” Matthew 6:27-33
So today, when I get off this computer it will be shut down until Tuesday morning. I’m going to enjoy EVERY SINGLE moment I have with my granddaughter. I’m going to spoil her with hugs, kisses, and toys that we shall play with together. We will swim in the pool (if the sun comes out), we shall visit the park, we shall get dirty playing with the finger paint and we will bond just as my mother bonded with her grandchildren.
I’m so excited I can hardly wait.
What is it you are struggling with today that should bring you so much joy but you are allowing the cares of this world to choke it? Let me know how I can pray for you in the comments below and I’ll stand with you in faith believing that God will lift that spirit of heaviness, oppression, and depression off of you so that you to can experience true joy in all things.
What are some scriptures or questions you ask yourself that have helped you overcome depression? Share it in the comments below so that others can be encouraged.
Y’all Be Blessed,
Audrey
2 Responses
Audrey, your Dad is a wise man. And for the record, I NEVER get everything I have on my to-do-list finished! I’ve come to realize my expectations are unrealistic and I have to be kinder to myself. What a precious decision you’ve made to enjoy the next few days with your granddaughter. I remember someone saying ~ When your on your death bed (ok..a little morbid… but there’s a point here…lol) you’re not going to think back and wish you spent more hours working.
Denise, you are such a sweetheart. Thank you so much for sharing the death bed analogy. Wasn’t morbid at all, just complete truth. You are so right, when we are at the end it’s not the houses, cars, money or material things it’s the relationships we had that were so important. I did take the ENTIRE weekend, shut down all electronics (that’s why you are just now getting this reply LOL) and enjoyed every moment with her. She is such a blessing and full of so much love. She had me cracking up all weekend with her little antics. Thanks again for the comment, means a lot that you would take the time to read my post and comment. 🙂 (((hugs)))